[Five Spiritualities Testimony] 💌 A Religious Vocation Blossoming Through the Darkness of Collective Assault and Mental Anguish!

A Religious Vocation Blossoming Through the Darkness

of Collective Assault and Mental Anguish! 💌

Graces that Overcame the Trauma of Collective Assault and

Restored the Holy Family (Sr. Anne Ryu Yoon-yeong, Naju, South Korea)

I am Anne Ryu Yoon-yeong, 33 years old, living in Naju, South Korea. My father was a career soldier and a very violent man. My parents often fought, and my father would throw things around the house, breaking everything. He even beat my older brother so severely that blood splattered on the wall and he had to be taken to the emergency room. Whenever my parents fought, I was so terrified that I would burst into tears and run out of the house without knowing where to go.

My mother sought refuge in her faith and began attending church, but it did not bring much comfort. I still remember her staggering under the influence of alcohol, and even her attempts to take her own life… As a little girl, I trembled in fear that my mother might die, crying and praying desperately before the statues of Jesus and the Blessed Mother to save her.

Then my mother came to know about the Naju Shrine in South Korea. She began

going on pilgrimage there every first Saturday of the month, completely quit drinking, and started to live a true life of faith. The darkness that had surrounded her was lifted.

As she continued her pilgrimages to Naju, she prayed fervently to the Blessed Mother of Naju, and as a result, my father—who had been an official in a Buddhist temple—was converted to the Catholic faith.

When I was in middle school, I was well liked by some of my seniors, which led my

friends to grow increasingly jealous. Their jealousy turned into slander and false

accusations — and tragically, those people were not strangers but my own school and church friends.

Because of their severe gossip and schemes, I was taken to a construction site — dark, with scattered bricks, wooden planks with nails, and metal pipes — where more than twelve people brutally assaulted me. They slapped my face repeatedly, pulled my hair, kicked me all over my body, and beat me with a wooden stick while forcing me to kneel.

Even though my body suffered greatly from hours of assault, the pain of betrayal was far greater and shattered me completely. My body was trembling, my eyes were no longer normal, and I was on the verge of death, yet my father searched desperately for me when I went missing.

The moment I entered the house, my father assumed I had been getting into fights with gangs of delinquents and beat me repeatedly. After that, I locked myself in my room and could not come out. I screamed every day, but became mute, unable to say a word, and was said to have seemed like I had gone insane.

It was only later that my father realized I had been brutally beaten by more than a

dozen people. Seeing his daughter in that state, he blamed himself, drank heavily every day, and repeatedly smashed his head against the wall, threatening to end his life. My mother, meanwhile, could not eat anything for a month and lay bedridden. Because of the trauma, I lost most of my memories of that time.

After a month, my mother brought me to the Naju Shrine, where I met Mama Julia, the visionary of Naju. She approached me with a warm smile, opened her arms, embraced me tightly, and prayed fervently for me. After that encounter, I was able to cry aloud for the first time in a month — and that remains the only memory I have from my middle school days. After that, I came back to life. I stepped out of my room again, transferred to another school, and was able to graduate from middle school.

However, the wound of betrayal from my church friends was so deep that I could not even go near a church. I removed every holy image from my room and resented Jesus and the Blessed Mother and turned away from Them.

I suffered from terrible nightmares, waking up screaming in the middle of the night, unable to sleep at all. I could not control my anger or trust anyone. Like a hedgehog raising its spines, I became sharp and defensive, hurting those around me.

Driven by severe self‑hatred, I engaged in self‑harm and attempted suicide. Struggling with anxiety and depression, I sank deeply into worldly distractions, becoming addicted to alcohol, cigarettes, and shopping. I began hanging out with delinquent youths and did every bad thing I could. Even my teachers gave up on me. During class, I would shout, play cards, and disturb both teachers and classmates to release my stress.

I came to despise myself and felt like trash. Unlike my peers who were running toward their goals and dreams, my only goal was simply to survive each day.

Eventually, I entered university, hoping to start a new life. However, that normal life lasted only a short while. A senior who was seven years older than me — and who had feelings for me — spread malicious rumors throughout the entire campus, even reaching the professors. Not a single person came to ask me whether the rumor was true. Everywhere I went, people whispered about me, and every friend I had turned away.

The shock was so great that I began to hear voices telling me to die. When I looked in the mirror, I even suffered hallucinations of another person laughing at me. In that state, I attempted suicide once again. I had heard that those who take their own lives go to hell, but I felt no fear. Whether it was Heaven or Hell, the very thought of never being able to die forever felt unbearably terrifying.

I could not say anything to my parents, who had already been deeply hurt because of me, so I forced myself to go to school as if nothing had happened. But I was so afraid of people that I could no longer bear it, and eventually, I became unable to attend school at all.

I thought to myself, “Why should I live? Why was I even born? My mother believed in Jesus so fervently — if He truly exists, why does He not care for me?” Every night, I cried and begged, “Please don’t let me wake up tomorrow,” while resenting Jesus. At that time, my older brother and father fought loudly every day, even brandishing knives, so people around them sometimes called the police.

My boyfriend was the only one who believed in me and stayed by my side. Needing someone to rely on, I decided to marry him. But deep inside, I instinctively knew how my life would end. 

I knew that even if I got married, it would not last long — and that my final destination would ultimately be suicide. Still, marriage felt like my last hope.

Around that time, I followed my mother to Naju, and Mama Julia told me that I had a vocation to the religious community of the Mary’s Ark of Salvation in Naju Shrine. I was truly shocked. A life spent in constant prayer seemed completely incompatible with who I was. Moreover, I was mentally unstable, had committed many sins, was living in sin, and naturally believed that my end would be hell. Most importantly, I had no faith in God and no love for Him at all.

Of course, I had no intention of entering the religious community of the Mary’s Ark of Salvation, yet the thought kept returning no matter what I did. So before Jesus of Mt. Calvary at the Blessed Mother’s Mountain in Naju, I said, “If You truly exist and if I am meant to enter that community, then please end my relationship with my boyfriend and change my heart.” 

But even as I said it, I did not believe it. However, to my astonishment, my heart was changed in an instant. I do not even remember how it happened—when I came to my senses, I was already preparing to enter. My relationship with my boyfriend had been completely resolved, and the thing I worried about the most, smoking, no longer even crossed my mind.

Afterward, I came to realize that Mama Julia had been praying unceasingly for me, a poor sinner, and that it was through her prayers that my heart had been changed. I had entered the community thinking that if things became difficult, I could simply leave.

But it was entirely different from what I had imagined. Jesus allowed me to feel His presence constantly. He became my Father, my Friend, and I grew to love Him so deeply. Each day living at the Naju Shrine was filled with such happiness that I could hardly contain my heart.

Living in the love of Jesus, I continued to hear about the life of the Five Spiritualities that Mama Julia has lived. I learned how she endured countless beatings and was treated like a slave by her maternal relatives, yet she practiced “Semchigo” (Korean word, thinking positively, regarding it as love) and overcame every trial.

She suffered innumerable assaults that could have led to death without any reason, but when she did not yet know God, she accepted them as her fate, offering them up, practicing “Semchigo” as if she was loved. And after coming to know God, she offered them for the repentance of sinners, forgiving unconditionally. Even when she witnessed her husband's infidelity, she offered up her heart filled with tears of blood and responded to him with unconditional love.

Moved by the words that Jesus finds such consolation in Mama Julia that He forgets the sins of the world, I cried and resolved, “Jesus! I want to follow Mama Julia and offer up everything beautifully to bring You comfort!” 

That day, following the example of Mama Julia’s life, I was able to forgive all those who had deeply hurt me, including my friends from the parish and seniors at university, through the Five Spiritualities of Naju.

And with a heart united in the suffering of Jesus and Mama Julia, I offered all of my past pains to Jesus. Even though I am an unworthy sinner, I was filled with joy that through my painful incidents, I could meditate, even in a small way, on the pains of Jesus and Mama Julia. I was truly grateful that I was allowed to experience those painful incidents from my past.

A year after entering the Naju community, the friends I met said, seeing my complete transformation, "I don’t believe in God, but seeing you, I believe He exists." After I entrusted my family entirely to the Lord, the Blessed Mother, and prayers of Mama Julia, my family experienced a remarkable transformation.

My formerly violent father no longer gets angry at all after making a pilgrimage to the Naju Shrine. He smiles every day and, following the Naju spirituality of “It’s my fault,” he is the first to ask forgiveness from the family, saying, “I’m sorry. It’s my fault.” He now attends Mass daily, prays 20 decades of the Rosary each day, and has already completed his third round of copying the Bible by hand.

Even my older brother, who heard the words “I’m sorry” from our father for the first time in his life, has changed like a gentle lamb. By the grace of the Blessed Mother of Naju, he met a good lady, married, and is living well, and he gets along with our father.

How can I possibly express in words my gratitude that Jesus, through Mama Julia, has guided me and my family—sinners who were trapped in darkness, unable to discern what is right, committing every kind of sin, and causing pain to the Lord and the Blessed Mother—onto the path of salvation and eternal life?

Living at the Naju Shrine, I now feel every day the presence and love of Jesus— something I had never experienced even once before. My heart, which had been filled with hatred and resentment, unable to forgive, is now overflowing with love and gratitude toward the Lord and the Blessed Mother. 

Next year will already mark ten years since I entered the community. I, who once wanted nothing more than to die each day, am now so grateful and happy to be allowed to live at the Naju Shrine that, though I am unworthy, I have offered the rest of my life entirely for the repentance of sinners, following Mama Julia.

My testimony is a small and imperfect one. Many priests and religious, young people who have visited the Naju Shrine have begun anew a life of true conversion through the Five Spiritualities of Naju. It breaks my heart to see that the Blessed Mother of Naju are still not recognized and continue to be persecuted, and I cannot hold back my tears. I earnestly pray that the Shrine of Our Lady of Naju may soon be approved with a Nihil Obstat. 

Anne Ryu Yoon-yeong November 15, 2025

👆 Before knowing the Naju Shrine 👆

✨👆 After knowing the Naju Shrine 👆 ✨

🌹 She made her perpetual vows on May 16 and received a new religious name. She is now called Sr. Emmanuella. 😇💖

👇🏻 “Click to watch the testimony video.” 👇🏻

✨Come to Naju and experience for yourself! ✨

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Email: marysnaju@najumary.or.kr