648. I Overcame It with the Love I Learned from the Lord

💌648. I Overcame It with the Love I Learned from the Lord

It was a day when the rain was falling in a damp, persistent drizzle. I was taking a bus to visit my mother’s house in the countryside, but that day, the bus was so crowded that even the stairs were jam-packed with people. I closed my eyes and prayed the rosary for the repentance of sinners, with Semchigo as if I would take it easy.

Then, suddenly, something like a stick poked my buttocks from behind. I was so startled at that moment that I pushed it away hard with my right hand. I thought, “What was that? Maybe I got poked by the umbrella handle?” But I realized I had touched a man’s private part, which had been exposed after he unzipped his pants.

I was momentarily so embarrassed. It was hard to express, as my buttocks had been poked and the flesh even touched my hand, but I quickly offered it up. “Yes, as a child of the Lord, I will offer it up more graciously, practicing Semchigo as if it were an umbrella handle and a stiff finger! Let me offer it up for the repentance of the poor soul blinded by that obscene sin.”

How shameful and terrible sexual harassment it is! If I think of it as something dirty, it can feel truly filthy and ugly, making me uncomfortable. However, when I offered it up to the Lord with Semchigo as if it was an umbrella handle, I felt nothing but deep pity for him, blinded by lust and committing sin. I remembered something from my middle school days. My classmate, Moon Soon, who was a year older than me, suddenly touched my breast while I was sleeping.

Since my childhood, when I was unaware, I valued purity. Even though she was a girl, it was so difficult for me that my heart would drop every time I saw her. However, I did not show it and tried my best to overcome it by thinking, “Let me practice Semchigo as if my friend patted my back.” How hard I tried to offer it! I was young then and since I did not know the Lord, it was even harder for me whenever I saw her.

I offered it up with Semchigo as if she had just touched my shoulder. However, now that I know the Lord, it was different. I immediately forgave the man who had sexually harassed me and offered it up to the Lord, along with everything from my school days. And I offered it up, thinking, “Yes, if I had been fat and unappealing, this would not have happened. This must have happened because he did not find me unpleasant. Since his sin occurred because I was there, it is my fault.”

“Oh! Lord, forgive them. May that soul, burning with lust and recklessly ignoring right and wrong, be quickly freed from the devil of lust and become an instrument to reveal Your glory.”

“Yes, yes, my beloved adorable baby, even after suffering such severe sexual harassment, do you not hate him but instead desire his forgiveness?”

“Of course, Lord. Even though he exposed himself and sexually harassed me, I offered it up with Semchigo as if it were just a firm piece of flesh passing by and prayed for him. Because of this, it has not left a deep wound in my heart.

He has committed a wrong but what benefit would it bring to my soul if he were to be condemned for it? And what would change in me? What truly matters is that You are always by my side—no, within me—living and dwelling in me at every moment.”

“My beloved, kind baby! You have completely offered everything by forgiving the one who sexually harassed you so that he may become an instrument to reveal my glory. Because of this, I will grant your earnest petition as it is.”

“Oh, my love, my Lord! It was not done by me but by the love You had already taught me.”

At this, Jesus, filled with joy, spoke in a warm and delighted voice: “Oh, my beloved Little Soul! Yes, yes, that is it! I, who live within you and am always with you, feel such immense joy and am taking comforting rest whenever I see you practicing selfless love for your neighbors, expecting nothing in return—so much so that I momentarily forget the sins of the world.”

“Oh, oh, my love, my beloved! How could this unworthy and insignificant sinner dare to call You my beloved? Yet, just as the beating heart within me cannot be separated from my body, You are my one and only Beloved, inseparable from me. This feeble creature with frail and turbulent human blood flowing through my veins, will love You alone and go only to You even if ten million years were to pass.”

“My beloved daughter, my adorable Little Soul! My love for you is far higher, deeper, and wider—a love that is the most sublime and pure, far surpassing your love for me.”

“Oh, my love, my everything! This unworthy and insignificant sinner belongs only to You. Through all my suffering, I will become an atoning sacrifice in reparation for all the sins committed by humanity. Accept all the remaining time and passion of my life as a comfort to You. Amen.”

When I returned home, I immediately took off the clothes that had been touched by him, washed them and cleansed my hands. As I did, I fervently prayed, asking the Lord to thoroughly wash away the impure thoughts of that soul with His Precious Blood, so that he may be freed from lust and live a renewed life of resurrection. Trusting firmly that the Lord would fulfill this as it was, I offered it up and my heart felt much lighter.

My personal reflection note with Mama Julia🌹💗 

Link 👇🏻

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