💌 468. Even in the terminal stage of cancer, I took care of my 96-year-old grandmother-in-law. So, what would there be that I could not do?

Upon hearing that my mother-in-law, who had not been seen for a long time, was giving my landlady’s baby a bath, I became greatly perplexed. But I quickly offered it up with Semchigo as if my mother-in-law had fed meals and baby food to my third and fourth children and changed diapers. Also practicing Semchigo as if she helped me who was even unable to drink water due to the vomiting and diarrhea disorder, I tried to muster all my strength to stand up.

“Right, I, being diagnosed with terminal cancer, took care of my 96-year-old grandmother-in-law, so what would there be that I could not do? I can do it!” But against my will, I was completely exhausted and could not exert any strength. This was because I poured out upward and downward by vomiting and diarrhea while being not able to eat anything. Furthermore, I was very exhausted from constantly going to the only old traditional pit toilet located far away.

Furthermore, the toilet was a communal toilet for the many family members of the landlady. So, just imagine how many people used it! If someone was in the toilet, I had to barely endure the nauseating feeling that rose up to the tip of my chin, practicing Semchigo as if I received God's great love, while patiently waiting and stamping my feet anxiously. Then, when I finally got in, I ended up throwing up and pouring down, and how many times I went in and out of the toilet!

Still, determined to prepare baby food for my crying hungry youngest, I struggled and went to the traditional kitchen. However, in a state of dizziness, I tripped on the doorstep, and with a thud, I collapsed onto the floor of the kitchen. As a strong impact occurred, injuring my right arm and ankle severely, it felt like I would lose consciousness right away due to the collapse.

However, I quickly rose, meditating on the high, deep, and wide love of Jesus, Who, even while carrying the cross and falling, rose again and walked the path of the cross to the end. Eventually, I crawled for lack of strength but I offered it up with Semchigo as if I were healthy and Semchigo as if my mother-in-law had assisted well. I managed everything on my own with difficulty, and I prepared baby food after making a firewood fire and fed it to my child.

And while feeding a meal to the third child, thinking, “She will come after bathing the landlady’s baby.” I anxiously waited for my mother-in-law for a long time. However, before I knew it, it was already lunchtime and despite waiting and waiting, my mother-in-law did not come to take care of the third and fourth children. Even though lunchtime had passed, I still could not feed the children, so my heart was starting to feel sorrowful.

As I could not let my children practice Semchigo as if they ate meals, I barely managed to get up, pulling myself together, though I was getting semi-conscious due to serious ill status.

Having been completely exhausted and even injured my ankle with such an ill body condition, I pushed myself to crawl to the kitchen and prepare lunch for my children to ensure they were fed. While changing my youngest child's diapers, it was particularly difficult due to my injured right wrist. However, I thought, ‘How grateful I am to still have this hand, despite the injury!’ and offered it up graciously.

All my children were toilet-trained before turning one but the youngest one took a little longer. It might be because I had not taken good care of him when I had given birth to him due to my severe pain from terminal cancer. So I always felt sorry. On top of it, now that I could not change diapers well due to my injured arm, I was so broken-hearted. Nevertheless, I practiced Semchigo, as if my mother-in-law were helping me and I offered up my aching heart to the Lord. I managed to accomplish everything by exerting the power of love with my injured arm.